Born in the Endless Mountains of Sullivan County, Ted was raised on hunting and fishing. Now he hunts for deals at antique shops and auctions...and he fishes for compliments weekday mornings on WILQ, maybe he should try a different bait.

In the fertile fields of his mind, Ted farms and raises cattle, hogs, chickens and goats. In real life he helps to raise his 3 boys; Alex, Zach and Clay with the help of two above average Ex-wives...both in the witness protection program.

He is an accomplished dancer, painter, songwriter, author and bullshitter, as is evident with this self-penned bio.

They say it's lonely at the top...and apparently its not much better in the middle where Ted has no friends and only a few aquaintences.